Yesterday morning Granny told Gramps she loved him. Then when I stood by her bed, she said something that sounded like "Sarah cares." Then she said, "Sarah Sarah Sarah Sarah Sarah ..." and reached toward me. I don't know how much of that was reflex movement, but I don't think all of it was, and I don't want it to be. Mom says if nothing else she is glad I was there for Granny to say my name.
Granny also told us that her head, chest, and stomach hurt. She is being medicated every four hours now with the medicine she is supposed to get every eight hours. She also has a patch of the medicine for her chest instead of getting a pill every so often. She also has a catheter, and initially about 2,000 CC's was emptied from her bladder! Dad says that's about two liters!
Tonight she is more peaceful. Thank You, Lord, for answering our prayers for peace for her body and mind. She said Gramps several times. At first I thought she was saying "cross" because we had just sang "The Old Rugged Cross." She had wanted us to sing. When Gramps, Cheryl, and I did, she sang too. So I thought she said "cross," but then Gramps said she squeezed his hand. I think she said Gramps.
When we were singing, Cheryl showed me that Granny had raised her arms up above her pillow. What was it we were singing? I don't remember.
I miss Granny. I can't touch her; she doesn't like to be touched. I can't hold her hand like Gramps can. But I know he needs that more than I do. I know Granny loves me. No one can tell me different. I had wonderful last conversations with her. They weren't long, but they were enough to make me know that she loves me, and she is right: that IS all there is. I know Gramps needs to touch her. He always went away to be emotional until the very end. I just wish I could hug her one more time ...