March 16th, 2001


post-surgery ramblings

I always go into these surgeries with mixed feelings, and the weirdest of those is wondering if it's really going to be a worthwhile thing. Even if the surgery is considered medically successful, would the benefits be so small that I wouldn't think them worth the pain? It's just another twist on the old thinking, "Maybe it really is all in my head." That almost causes more anxiety than the whole issue of having the surgery! It's easy to say that at least I would know that I tried, but since I haven't been in that place I don't quite know how happy I'd be with that explanation.

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  • Current Music


This is your lucky day. If you can answer the question right, I'll give you $64,000 ... when I have it.

Why do you suppose I would be up at this ungodly hour?

  1. because I feel like reliving my freshman at AU days

  2. because I'm star gazing

  3. because Dori thinks it's a great idea

  4. because I'm rebelling against whoever told me to go to sleep

  5. because Mom snores too loud

  6. a and d

  7. d and e

  8. all of the above

  9. none of the above

  10. Don't become a professor; just tell the answer already!

Ok, remind me NOT to let Dori on the beds unless she has been out within the last five minutes and I've been giving her her fair share of Mom time. Oh, and yes, Mom snores too loud. I first had it in mind to ignore this and get a couple hours' sleep and deal with it in the morning. I wasn't sleeping--Mom was snoring and I was worrying about what Dad would think. Soooo... I got up and changed what was in the washer to the dryer, stripped the bed, and dragged the sheets in to the washer. I seriously don't think I'm supposed to be doing all that lugging and bending and stuff at this stage of the game, but I did it anyway. My parents aren't going to get up and do it for me--in their minds it's easily fixed by not allowing Dori on the bed, and we all know where that road leads with me. So I'm not taking it again.

Then I let the dogs out because Dori didn't seem to be done. Elli came back in really quick, and I stood out there calling Dori and getting madder and madder because she wasn't coming. I even tried thebiscuit bribe, and she wasn't coming. Inca must've caught something really fascinating. ...

The problem was that Dori had come in with Elli. There I was, calling like a fool, and she was enjoying the whole thing. It's a good thing she's a cute, sweet Labrador. *grin*

On my way back to bed, Dad was coming out for a drink of water and asked when I was going to bed. I said, "When my sheets are dry," and waited for the lambast. He didn't give it to me, and he even offered to change them over if I'd wake him up when the dryer was done. So it wasn't all bad. I'll just be sleeping the morning away, hopefully. Advil kicking in would be a real good thing about now. And as far as Dori goes, I'm getting the message that she's needing something from me. I know what it is, but I don't know how to give it to her. I've heard people say their schools didn't recommend tug games with the dogs, but this is precisely why Dori needs it: it works off some of that energy and insecurity she has. But I can't do it right now, and it's no good to Dori and me if somebody else does it because it's security in OUR bond she's needing.

  • Current Music
    Mom snoring across the hall