How often do I heap punishment on myself when all God wants is to show me how deep, how high, and how wide His love for me is? I punish myself with my self-hatred--pure emotional self-harm. Some people demonstrate self-hatred by inflicting physical wounds upon themselves. I do it by making comments that would be brutally painful if delivered by another person. But like those who inflict wounds upon themselves, I allow my anger and self-hatred to distract me from my emotional pain. I can take it because (in my mind) I deserve it.
Sometimes He heals the body, and sometimes He multiplies His grace to the afflicted ones. Sometimes He parts the waters, and sometimes He will go with us through them.